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Tyler Struyk authoredTyler Struyk authored
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body_class: 'not-front node-page node-page--node-type-article'
title: 'As You Wish'
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<p>You’re the Dread Pirate Roberts, admit it. How many do you think you could
handle? You mean you wish to surrender to me? Very well, I accept. But how can
you be sure? Will this do? You truly love each other and so you might have
been truly happy. Not one couple in a century has that chance, no matter what
the story books say. And so I think no man in a century will suffer as greatly
as you will. You only think I guessed wrong! That’s what’s so funny! I
switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim
to one of the classic blunders - The most famous of which is “never get
involved in a land war in Asia” - but only slightly less well-known is this:
“Never go against a Sicilian when death is on the line!” Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha…</p>
<p>They were both poisoned. I spent the last few years building up an immunity
to iocane powder. Unless the enemy has studied his Agrippa… which I have.
Move? You’re alive. If you want I can fly. You just shook your head… doesn’t
that make you happy? Truly, you have a dizzying intellect. Probably he means
no *harm*.</p>
<p>Well, I’m not saying I’d like to build a summer home here, but the trees
are actually quite lovely. And YOU: friendless, brainless, helpless, hopeless!
Do you want me to send you back to where you were? Unemployed, in Greenland?
No, there is too much. Let me sum up. Buttercup is marry Humperdinck in a
little less than half an hour. So all we have to do is get in, break up the
wedding, steal the princess, make our escape… after I kill Count Rugen. You
seem a decent fellow… I hate to kill you. You seem a decent fellow… I hate to
die. Naturally… but I find that Thibault cancels out Capa Ferro. Don’t you?
</p>